We are all former students at Lakenheath High School and other public schools in East Anglia. We were in school in the 70s and 80s and drank deeply from the well of British culture of those decades - the pints, the telly, and of course the footie!
About the only thing taking the sting out of England's troubles right now is watching other teams imploding alongside them. And we've got two more chances for a spot of Schadenfreude today. First up, Portugal vs. the hard working North Koreans. Later today, Spain have to get their campaign started against Honduras. Join me for a giggle or two at their expense, eh?
posted by The Blue Devil @ 6:28 AM
We are all former students at Lakenheath High School and other public schools in East Anglia. We were in school in the 70s and 80s and drank deeply from the well of British culture of those decades - the pints, the telly, and of course the footie!
255 Comments:
Oh, bugger. Just when I was enjoying the idea of imagining the headlines on Gazetta dello Sport this morning, I've just seen the news out of the England camp. And it isn't pretty.
First up, confirmation that the England players had a beer and whine session after the Algeria debacle, during which they appointed John Terry their spokesman in dealing with Don Fabio.
Second, a scheduled press conference to air the grievances was squashed by Capello and his staff.
And finally, as if that weren't bad enough, Capello has been caught on camera saying that he feels as if the last two years have been a waste of his time. (sigh)
Here's where Group H stands now:
1. Brazil Played 2 GD (3) Pts 6
2. Portugal Played 1 GD (0) Pts 1
3. Ivory Coast Played 1 GD (-2) Pts 1
4. North Korea Played 1 GD (-1) Pts 0
The teams are in for this morning's match:
Portugal: Eduardo, Miguel, Carvalho, Alves, Coentrao, Tiago, Mendes, Meireles, Ronaldo, Almeida, Simao
North Korea: Myong-Guk Ri, Jong-Hyok Cha, Chol-Jin Pak, Jun-Il Ri, Yun-Nam Ji, Kwang-Chon Ri, Yong-Hak Ahn, In-Guk Mun, Nam-Chol Pak, Yong-Jo Hong, Tae-Se Jong
Not a lot of yellow card issues to speak of going into the match.
Cristiano Ronaldo's yellow card from the Ivory Coast match has been appealed and rescinded by FIFA.
Meanwhile, North Korea somewhat escaped the Brazil match without having any of their players carded. How does that happen?
The teams are out and the weather is absolutely appalling. Reports of thundershowers to come too.
As the table above indicates, Portugal have a real chance to grab the second slot by the neck today. A comprehensive win would put them in good shape to meet Brazil in the third match on Friday, given that Brazil have already qualified for the second round.
Keep an eye on Tae-Se Jong during the anthem here. He was absolutely losing his mind while it played last time out. And then he went out and shot every time he touched the ball.
Tae is holding it together a bit better today, merely closing his eyes in quiet contemplation.
Four changes to Portugal. Almeida and Simao are back in. Tiago is in for Deco. And Paulo Ferreira has dropped out for Miguel to come in.
Not surprisingly, there are no changes to the North Korea side that ran Brazil so hard in the first match.
A lot being made of that last match when these two sides met - a historic encounter at Goodison Park in 1966. The North Koreans took the lead 3-0 before Portugal came roaring back with four goals from Eusebio to pip them 5-3.
First run from Ronaldo produces a left-footed deflected drive that the keeper holds well.
Another good drive from Portugal with Ricardo Carvalho bursting out of the area and feeding Ronaldo. The ball got back to Carvalho who Jabulanied well over.
Nice, bright start from Portugal here. They've clearly come to take no prisoners today after that muted opener against Ivory Coast.
Another great break from Portugal that finds Simao out wide left. Couldn't get his cross over.
Oh - Ricardo Carvalho off the post with a header from the corner!
The North Koreans kept it tight against Brazil in the first half, but they are rocking here.
Almeida appears to be free to shoot on goal but was just offside. On the replay, he was level. Should have got the benefit of the doubt.
Oh - Tae did well and Jong-Hyok Cha struck it first time. Not that far away.
The Koreans inching their way back into this one after nearly getting overwhelmed early doors. Free kick chance here. Tae of course is going to hit it from forty yards. Jabulani.
Oh - Tae had a chance there, but his touch let him down at the key moment.
As we saw against Brazil, the Koreans are well capable of scoring a shock goal.
Adrian Healey with a nice bit of trivia there. Goalkeeper Myong-Guk Ri describes himself not as "keeper" but as "guardian of the gates of the motherland." Love it.
Oh - Yong-Jo Hong gets wide and hits a rocket that Eduardo can only parry. the striker following up heads over. Shame.
Portugal are trying to get some attacks going down the left through left back Miguel. I think that the right wing option through Ronaldo is the better one.
North Korean right back Jong-Hyok Cha has done a nice job channeling Ronaldo down the left so that he has to cross with his weaker foot inside of being able to turn inside onto his right foot for a shot.
Corner to Portugal...disappointing, doesn't beat the first man. Moreilles has been poor so far.
The North Koreans are playing as if this is a fine spring day instead of the rain pelting down Biblically.
A bit of frustration creeping into the Portuguese play now, as the Koreans are pushing forward.
Center back Kwang-Chon Ri did very well there against Simao as the ball came over from Mereilles.
GOAL! Portugal open the scoring with a lovely move. Through ball to Mereilles who steers his shot under the keeper.
1-0 Portugal!
This result if it holds up would put the plucky North Koreans out of the tournament, which I'm sure they're aware of. At the half hour mark, we still have plenty of football to play.
A first yellow card for Pak Choi-Jin.
Btw, Adrian has corrected my earlier comment. FIFA apparently did not rescind Ronaldo's yellow. If he were to pick up a second yellow today or in the third match against Brazil, he'd be suspended.
Oh - Mereilles was nearly in there again from a sloppy clearance. He scuffed his shot left of goal.
Yellow card there for Pedro Mendes. And a free kick for NK....
Yong-Jo Hong strikes it straight into the wall. We still haven't seen a free kick goal.
Ronaldo has a go from a difficult angle when he could have easily played a teammate in.
North Korea running out of time in this first half.
Half-time: 1-0
Portugal have done just enough to stave off those embarrassing headlines for the French, English and Italian teams earlier in the week, but they've been far from convincing.
Back for the second half kick-off now....
Positive start from Portugal, with Tiago having a go that is tipped over by the keeper.
Oh - Hong nearly had a chance to equalize there. How much would I love that?
Tae picks up a free kick....
Oh, the free kick is well worked and of course it's Tae who hits the shot. Eduardo collects. Tae had promised on his blog that he'd score a goal a game. Nothing so far.
Oh - a nice move down the left through Ronaldo and Coentrao leaves Almeida free in the box. Put his shot wide.
GOAL! Simao polishes off a lovely move through the Portuguese midfield. Nice interplay there between Mereilles and Almeida.
2-0 Portugal!
This may well come down to goal difference. Ivory Coast will have to put some goals by the Koreans who will have been eliminated today and hope that Brazil stuff Portugal. Should be fascinating.
GOAL! Almeida sticks a header in from a lovely Coentrao cross. The floodgates have opened for Portugal.
3-0!
Two changes for the North Koreans now....
Ronaldo on his bike now. Crosses to Tiago who slots home low in the right corner. Clinical.
4-0!
This rush of goals makes it very difficult for the Ivorians in the last match now. They'll have to overturn a six goal deficit to the Portuguese now.
Of course, Adrian Healey is pointing out the irony that the second slot may well be the better one in this group, as Spain have slipped up so badly.
Oh - Ronaldo on the right now tees up Mereilles for his brace. Misses to the left of the goal.
On www.fifa.com, I am in 1,162 place out of 359,218 . . . not bad, eh?
Not bad at all, mate. Good morning!
Tae hits a header just wide while his jersey was being held by the always dirty Carvalho.
Almeida gets booked for some mouthiness.
The first goalscorer Raul Mereilles goes off for Miguel Veloso.
Oh - Ronaldo strikes one off the bar!
Morning, Bob . . . Portugal were being outplayed until the first goal . . .
Twenty minutes left in this one. It's over as a contest. The only thing of interest in the goal tally.
I agree - up until the half hour mark, I thought it could swing in either direction. NK have folded under the pressure in this half.
How have you been?
What is your plan for viewing both games simultaneously on Wednesday?
Another goalscorer Simao comes off for Duda.
On vacation at the beach so everything is grand . . . looking forward to my morning run at the break . . . not sure I'll be here for Chile v. SUI . . . need to run some errans and that seems the one to miss . . .
That's always a pickle, isn't it, WHR. I reckon I'll watch England v. Slovenia live and just hope that ESPN don't give away the score of the US v. Algeria. Hope to watch that one in the 12-2 pm slot. We'll see how that goes with the games tomorrow. You?
Yeah - it did seem from your post yesterday that it was heavy lifting for you. Which beach?
And now Almeida comes off to an ovation, replaced by Liedson who kept Almeida out of the side in the first match.
Ah - shame about that. A near thing there for the Koreans. I'd love to see them stick one in for their efforts here.
I reckon that you're right to skip the next one. I'll be here and hoping that UWS, who's finishing up school this week, will join me.
GOAL! Liedson completes the rout. The biggest scoreline so far now. The striker latched on to a poor clearance and roofed his shot.
5-0!
The goal difference between Portugal and the Ivory Coast is now seven. Hard to see the Ivorians narrowing that one. And that assumes the Brazilians will be bothered to beat Portugal.
I'm in Isle of Palms, SC . . . Wont' be able to record . . . We have a couple of televisions . . . but can't move them . . . I'm sure I'll have to watch the USA game and I expect ESPN will give live updates of the England game. . .
Oh, that's lovely. Nice one. Enjoy your break, mate. You've earned it.
GOAL! Ronaldo, the boy wonder, finally gets his goal. It wasn't pretty. A tap in in the end.
6-0!
7-0! Tiago gets a brace. Cross over. Header down into the right corner. Easy.
Portugal now just running up a score that will be near impossible for the Ivorians to turn around. Drogba will fancy his hand at claiming a hat-trick though.
Nine goal difference now.
I'll be back for the 2:30 . . . nice chatting with you, Bob. . .
CMON ENGLAND!
If the Group H results go in a certain way, Portugal may just have bought themselves a Round of 16 against Switzerland or Chile.
Cheers, Trev! See you then.
Full-time: 7-0 Thump!
Next up, then - the two sides that won their openers in Group H. As the saying goes, "something's got to give."
Group H looks like this at the moment:
1. Chile Played 1 GD (1) Pts 3
2. Switzerland Played 1 GD (1) Pts 3
3. Honduras Played 1 GD (-1) Pts 0
4. Spain Played 1 GD (-1) Pts 0
The team news is in for Chile v. Switzerland
Chile: Bravo, Isla, Medel, Ponce, Jara, Vidal, Carmona, Fernandez, Sanchez, Beausejour, Suazo
Switzerland: Benaglio, Lichtsteiner, Von Bergen, Grichting, Ziegler, Behrami, Inler, Huggel, Fernandes, Frei, Nkufo
Some big names back for both sides then - Suazo returns for Chile and Frei for Switzerland.
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The yellow card situation -
Chile - Carlos Carmona and Matias Fernandez
Switzerland - Stefan Grichting, Renato Ziegler and Diego Benaglio
In yesterday's Armchair World Cup pod, the lads were joking that Switzerland are Mick McCarthy's "Dream Team."
I fancy Chile, who were impressive the other day, to run out winners today and have a decent shout of claiming top spot in the group. Then it will be up to Spain to lay down a marker against Honduras.
Poor old Philippe Senderos is ruled out with that injury that he picked up.
The Swiss get us started here in Port Elizabeth.
Early yellow card for Humberto Suazo, who went in late against Grichting.
Early free kick opportunity now for Chile....
Matty Fernandez launches one in and it's cleared out. Sanchez tries a pop. Jabulani effort.
Switzerland need to get to the 67th minute to beat Italy's World Cup record of consecutive minutes without the opposition scoring.
The Swiss now have an early free kick chance. Scrappy so far.
A great double save from Vidal and Carmona by Benaglio. He's earning his corn early on.
Oh dear - Sanchez found Suazo at the top of the box and the top goalscorer completely whiffed on it.
I'm in great danger of falling asleep during this one, I fear.
A draw here is probably the worst result for Spain, who will look to put Honduras out today. It would keep both sides in the hunt during the last group matches.
Blaise Nkufo, the Seattle Sounders new boy, is shown the yellow card for shirt tugging.
Twenty minutes gone and those two shots that Benaglio saved are the only shots on goal.
Carmona picks up a second yellow in the tournament for a sliding challenge and he's suspended for the Spain match at the end of the week.
And another yellow card for Waldo Ponce. He's already talked to him for some shirt tugging earlier.
And the rugged Grichting gets up for a header just wide right of goal.
Not really a match for the purists here. The Swiss are frustrating the superior Chilean side. I'm sure that Mick McCarthy approves.
Oh - Nkufo nearly latched onto a hospital backpass there, but Bravo did well to recover.
Half an hour gone. 0-0 zzzzzzzzzzzz
What's happened here?! West Ham United's Behrami has been sent off!
I think it was an elbow that clouted Vidal. A bit harsh there. He did catch his opponent while they were tangling but I thought Vidal made a meal of it.
Behrami is the tenth player to be sent off in this World Cup and we're not even through two rounds of matches yet.
You'd have to expect Switzerland to drop even further into their shell after that. Probably a 4-4-1 with only Nkufo chasing down long balls.
Lichtsteiner is penalized and he's not happy with it. I wouldn't mouth off to this ref.
Matty Fernandez delivers but it goes straight through.
It's all Chilean possession and pressure now. Desperate defending from the Swiss.
Oh - Beausejour delivers a great cross over but Suazo skies his header.
Inler tries a pop from distance. Gets it all wrong.
Beausejour again gets free wide left. Great control on the chest from Sanchez but his shot was straight at Benaglio.
Hitzfeld will just want to get his side into the dressing room all square and re-organize things now.
The big question for the last round of Group H games is whether Chile can change their stripes and play a bit more cautiously. You'd have to think that any side that actually tries to play football against the Spanish is going to get rolled.
Tranquillo Barnetta, who started the match against Spain, is on for a change.
The last moments of the first half ebbing away here with both sides happy to knock it about.
Half-time: 0-0
The ref has made it more difficult for this one to become entertaining, sending off Behrami.
The teams are back out for the second half. Chile are making two changes. Valdivia and Gonzalez on.
Barnetta picks up a yellow for tugging back Beausejour. They're having some trouble maintaining control of the winger.
Chile have it in the goal but it's ruled off for offside. Sanchez with a shot but a player was impeding Benaglio's vision in an offside position. Good decision by the ref.
Benaglio is having another absolute blinder here, saving again point blank from Sanchez. Some big clubs must be watching these displays.
Oh - I really thought Mark Gonzalez had scored from the corner. Just wide.
Sanchez is fouled by Inler who picks up a yellow. Also Matty Fernandez picks up one for something that happened off the ball. That's his suspension for the next match.
And now Gary Medel has picked up a yellow in a tangle from the resulting free kick. That Saudi Arabian ref is starting to lose the plot here. That's eight yellows and a red now.
Switzerland now have four minutes to play to break the World Cup record for minutes played without a goal scored against.
Chile make their final change here.
Switzerland have carved out a corner now. Poorly taken but it will eat up a few more seconds.
Derdiyok, the big target man who started against Spain and played a role in the goal, is coming on probably for Nkufo.
Hitzfeld may sense that the Chileans are leaving some gaps in the back and that they might be able to nick something here.
And Switzerland have now broken Italy's record. Mick McCarthy would be proud of them.
If Spain v. Switzerland was Arsenal v. Wigan, this feels more like Liverpool v. Hull City.
GOAL! The stout Swiss defense is finally breached. Mark Gonzalez finishes off a great move with a powerful downward header at the backpost.
1-0 Chile!
You know, now that I think of it, that goal might well make things even more tricky for the Spanish. It now gives Chile six points, so a point against Spain in the third match ensures that Spain would at best finish second and, if Switzerland were to beat Honduras, could be out altogether. It just gets worse and worse for Del Bosque's outfit. How will they respond today?
The Swiss now have under ten minutes to pull the irons out of the fire here. They would still of course have a chance qualify for the Round of 16 with a win against Honduras, who will likely get knocked out by Spain this afternoon.
It might all come down to goal difference in this group too, so the Swiss are happy to see Paredes put his shot over the bar.
Speaking of goal difference, I heard that, if England draw 2-2 with Slovenia and the US draw 0-0 with Algeria on Wednesday morning, Slovenia would top the group and the US and England would have to draw lots for the second slot!
I'm off to work now. I'll be back around 2 pm for the late match.
Back in the saddle for the late match. We've got a bit of Spanish dessert - a flan, if you will - on offer this afternoon. Given the earlier result, it's not absolutely necessary for Spain to win this one today, but you would have to think that the Spanish camp are looking at this one as a must-win.
The team news:
Spain: Casillas, Sergio Ramos, Puyol, Pique, Capdevila, Jesus Navas, Busquets, Alonso, Xavi, Torres, Villa
Honduras: Valladares, Mendoza, Chavez, Figueroa, Izaguirre, Palacios, Guevara, Turcios, Martinez, Espinoza, Suazo
The Spanish will have seen their Iberian cousins put the hammer down against North Korea earlier today. Will they be able to do the same, or will this be another frustrating exercise of what Frank Skinner calls "tippy tappy football."
From the Honduran line-up changes, it looks as if they're going to have a go at it.
No yellow card issues for Spain.
And only Wilson Palacios picked up a yellow in that earlier match with Chile.
Torres is back tonight at the expense of David Silva and Navas starts for Iniesta who picked up a knock in the Swiss match.
David Suazo is back for Honduras at the expense of the aging Pavon.
Start get us started then....
It's Martin Tyler and Ally McCoist on the mic this afternoon.
It's a slow start for the Spanish. I thought that they might go out gangbusters to try to kill off the game and any nerves.
There's an audible sense of excitement as Jesus Navas gets the ball early. Crosses but the keeper holds well.
Torres had a snapshot there. Only a half chance really. Doesn't connect.
There was a big shout for a penalty there but the referee didn't see it as handball.
OH - a great shot from David Villa strikes the bar!
Naughty from Xavi trying to play the free kick early and he gets a yellow card for his trouble.
The Honduran players are complaining to the referee that the Spanish players are going to ground too easily.
David Villa wins a corner....
From the corner, Sergio Ramos has a point blank headed chance. And he's cleaned out the keeper doing it.
Oh - Villa cut inside and slashed his shot wide. A scare for Honduras despite the inerrancy of the shot. Palacios can't afford to let his man cut inside like that.
First decent chance for Honduras cleared out nervously by Casillas.
Honduras are starting to get a bit more adventurous.
I agree with Ally McCoist. I've never been overly convinced by Iker Casillas. He's typically protected by a solid defense but for someone who isn't overtaxed, he does make a meal out of those chances.
GOAL! Yes - my Golden Boot boy dribbles through three of the Hondurans and slots into the top right corner. Ally thinks it the goal of the tournament. Might be.
Spain 1-0!
Suazo looks a bit off the pace tonight.
And now Mendoza goes diving in on Villa. He's really struggling to keep up with him.
Free kick in from Xavi and Sergio Ramos is called for a push.
As it stands, Spain and Switzerland are tied at "0" on goal difference. The head to head obviously favors the Swiss.
For some reason the vuvuzelas are louder than ever tonight.
Oh - how did Xavi miss that header from Navas's cross?
It has to be said that Spain haven't really turned on the style since the goal. They merely relaxed a bit.
Half an hour gone. Still 1-0. I fancy Honduras to have a chance to nick a goal at some point if this runs on this way.
If Spain do end up meeting Brazil in the Round of 16, I'd have to fancy Brazil at this point. They just seem to have more power.
Villa did awfully well to beat his man at the by-line.
Oh - free header for Torres from a Sergio Ramos cross. Should have scored there. He's showing some rust.
And again...Torres runs through but Jabulanis over. Could be 3 or 4-0 at this point.
Great turn from Xavi but couldn't play Torres in.
Torres is offside now as he runs through but he doesn't finish off the chance either.
Spain running Honduras somewhat ragged at this point, despite the tight scoreline.
Izaguirre picks up a yellow card and he's incensed by the overreaction from Jesus Navas.
I agree with Ally again that football in general needs to sort out the play-acting issues. It would be easy for FIFA to review the videotape after the match and, for example, rescind the red card for Kaka and assign a yellow for simulation to Keita.
Hi Bob,
I am home from grading Regents
I have seen none of the goals.
Kathy texted me with the goals for Portugal. I read here that Portugal were being outplayed before the goal?
Free kick here as the clock winds down. Xavi to take....
More argybargy now. A Honduran is down claiming an elbow. And Villa did strike out. Got away with it.
Yes, Villa had a little flick at the face after being stepped on
These guys need to grow up
Hey, Dave! I think it's true that Portugal were very nervy before the first goal and NK were shooting on sight.
This one has been all Spain, despite the scoreline. Villa lucky not to be sent off?
HT time and Spain are winning 1-0
Honduras not happy with David Villa
Half-time: 1-0 Spain. The Hondurans are surrounding Villa as he comes off. There's been fair too much play-acting going on. They both need to get on with the football and stop acting.
Lexi - "HP Sauce?" I've never heard that expression before. Did he make that up?
So, how was school today, mate?
Honduras get a started in the second half and Figueroa tries one from half way.
Honduras trying to punk the Spanish from the off here.
Honduras are playing it about for fun here.
Spain v. Portugal would be a hell of a match. Both teams play a similar short passing style.
So, in this group Chile have 6 points, Switzeland and Spain have 3... all three still have a chance
Martinez romps away with the ball now. Feeds Suazo.
Goal!!
David Villa with his brace
Spain seem to be able to pass the ball to each other... are you watching England
GOAL! Way hay - it's my Golden Boot boy again. Villa with a deflected shot (I'm giving it to him) for #2.
2-0 Spain Game over?
My two Golden Boot choices... ZERO GOALS!
Do I get bonus points for one of my golden boot choices being the very worst player in the tournament?
Yeah - Spain meet Chile. Obviously a draw isn't enough. At best Spain would come second in the group and might even go out with a Swiss win against Honduras, who will exit tonight. If Spain run up a score, that would help them out.
Pique is in the wars again. He got a boot in the eye against Switzerland and now he's got blood in his mouth. Off for treatment.
I'm afraid not. Even if he does apologize for being pants.
Spain beats Chile then the are in first
Yeah - right Spain are on +1 goal and Chile are on +2. A 1-niller would put Spain through to with the head to head.
I'm not sure that Spain will fancy either Portugal or Brazil on this form. They haven't exactly been scintillating.
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