It's Not Your Granddad's Crisp!

One of the enduring memories of high school in 70s Britain is enjoying a packet of Cheese and Onion with a pint of Strongbow while playing some pool with the boys at the White Hart. Back then, you basically had a choice of about five crisp flavors. Today, however, you can choose everything from Marmite to Aged Stilton. And Walkers aren't finished. They recently tested some brand new flavors on an unwitting British public.

Below are the new flavors along with the witty descriptions of The Guardian's Charlie Brooker. See if you can match them up:


a. Builder's Breakfast
b. Crispy Duck and Hoisin
c. Fish and Chips
d. Onion Bhaji
e. Cajun Squirrel
f. Chilli and Chocolate

1. "They taste precisely like a tiny cat piping hot farts through a potpourri pouch into your mouth."

2. "It captures the feeling of sitting in a greasy spoon, being dumped via text while your food repeats on you. Depressing."

3. "It's like a lame TV movie about India starring Adam Woodyatt, with a soundtrack consisting entirely of library music."

4. "It's like kissing someone who's just eaten a plateful of scampi. Halfway through, they belch in your mouth."

5. It's vaguely like the smell you get when you bleed a radiator, but sharper, more disgusting and worryingly 'human.'"

6. "They taste like the standard Roast Chicken flavor might if the 'chicken' in them had been killed with a hammer made of compacted sugar."

Good luck!