Fredonia Police Blotter

I've always been a big fan of small town police blotters. Big city crime sections are a bit grim, while their small town brethren are just quaintly humorous. Each one bears the unmistakable stamp of a bored journo who's trying to liven up a mundane job with idiosyncratic flourishes. In the local Fredonia paper, this seems to include unusual details such as the brand of alcohol consumed by the unfortunate miscreant caught drinking in public. Here's a sample:

* At 3:57 a.m. on October 4, officers responded to a 911 call involving a minor automobile accident on Lambert Avenue. When approaching the scene, Erin Barr, 21 was observed urinating on the sidewalk next to her vehicle. When questioned, she admitted that she had been drinking mai tais at the China Garden restaurant in Jamestown. A roadside sobriety test revealed that she was intoxicated.

* At 12:55 a.m. on October 6, Sharif Kassimsalisu, 24 and Agnus Laborgne, 21, were observed in a physical fight at 30 Water Street. When interviewed, Mr. Laborgne claimed that Mr. Kassimsalisu had agreed to pay $50 for a leather sofa and had returned to his apartment on Endicott Street to find Mr. Kassimsalisu and a friend loading said sofa into a small van. While the officers interviewed the two subjects, they were forced to restrain Mr. Kassimsalisu's friend, John Herbert, 22, as he began to yell obscenities at the officers.

* At 1:48 a.m. on October 7, Mark Wesolowski, 17, and Jessica Martinez, 20, were found by officers holding open containers of Genesee Cream Ale outside of Sunny's bar on 43 Water Street. While they were being interviewed, Ms. Martinez offered officers tickets to a karaoke night at Sunny's bar. They were both issued appearance tickets for having an open container of alcohol and underage possession.